Thursday, September 15, 2016

Musings at the Coffee House.

I am sitting at Simply Coffee in Burbank in the corner seat watching people walk by and nominally outlining my time-travel murder mystery story that I've had percolating for a little while.  I've got the whole thing mapped out in my head, I just have to get the structure down and then start writing it.  Trying a new tactic.  Usually I just sit and start writing, and I've found that doesn't really work.  I end up with a lot of first chapters and nothing else.

I'm not sure if this will end up being a novel or a screenplay.  I'm sort of leaning towards the latter since Time-Travel stories are sort of in right now, and this one has a twist of course.  It's not anything especially earth-shattering.  I want it to have a noir/Blade-Runner feel, but also with a 30's detective vibe crossed with a BBC Police Procedural, sort of set in the apocalypse aftermath with megadomes replacing cities.  Ambitious?  Mish-mash?  Maybe.

I should do the crossword.

Took less than 10 minutes.  I still got it. Used my new Lego Pen
These days I usually do the LA Times crossword online when I remember.  I still can't do the NY Times.  I have finished one or two in the past, perhaps I should start trying again.  We'll see, I need to get back into it though, I'm kind of rusty.  In fact I think I got the bottom right corner wrong.

This is what I awoke to this morning.  I actually got to bed pretty early last night.  My sleep app Pillow said I fell asleep by midnight and I only awoke once at 3:14 AM for 8 minutes.  Not bad.  Not great.

I'm not sure what keeping track of my sleep is supposed to accomplish, but I'm game to learn how to use my phone in new and interesting manners.  

I think Oliver might not be feeling all that well, he slept next to Kaylee all night, and he never does that, and he's been extra whiney when I wake him up.

Last night I dreamt that I was living in a house out in the middle of a large field that got used for some kind of carnival.  For some reason it was Christmas time and lights were everywhere.  Then I was on board the USS Enterprise as captain of the ship.  Our phasers were locked on target, but I don't know who we were fighting.  Probably Klingons.

Dreams are weird.

I need a coffee refill, but I don't have any cash, and I hate putting only $1 on a credit card.  Maybe I'll get a better drink.

This whole hanging out at a coffee house thing is new to me.

As is selling digital trading cards on eBay, but I'm doing it.  Last night the 10 cc (card count) Lime Green John Cena card that I was awarded for being one of the top 10 coin acquirers in last weeks' Topps WWE SLAM Tapjoy contest sold for $95!  For a DIGITAL CARD!  I wouldn't have bought it for that much, but hey, I'm glad someone else did.  I've paid a few bucks for cards here and there, mostly from money I've acquired selling other cards.

The story gets weirder though, the guy who bought the card is a member of Pojo, where I'm still a moderator.  Well OK, I'm a moderator again.  I was the grand-poo-bah super-moderator of the place from about 1998 to 2004 and was a real hard-ass. I finally got fed up with the hatred and quit.  I stayed away for quite some time, but I could never really leave permanently.  Anyway, Bill, the owner, asked if I wanted to come back as mod a few years ago, and I said yes, but with far less power and responsibility.  Anyway, some kid got caught trying to trade cards when he was trade banned for something he did 5 year ago. That's a pretty egregious violation of the rules, so his account was banned.  He pleaded and pleaded and whined and created new accounts trying to get his account back.  In the end, he bought my $95 card on eBay and asked if I would see what I could do about getting his account back.  Well someone bribes me for $95 when I'm broke as hell, sure I'll grease the wheels, I'm not above reproach.  And well, he got his account back this morning.  Again I no longer have direct control over these matters, I leave that to the other mods.  But they all pretty much respect me, and when I advocate for someone being unbanned, they tend to listen, because I don't do it very much.

Get this, the kid then traded the card BACK to me for nothing.  So basically I can sell it again and I'm ahead like $80 for the whole deal.  Life is strange.  I feel good about it though.  There's no reason why the kid can't have his account, Bill is always advocating for peeps to get second chances. So why not him?

I mean this is America, the LAND of second chances.  We all deserve one.  Even OJ Simpson.  (Btw I don't think he actually did it, I think it was his son, but I digress).

Who am I kidding this entire post is a digression.

This entire year has been a digression from my previous life.  Everything had fallen apart and now I'm rebuilding.  Besides trying to find gainful employment and being Kaylee's "Learning Coach" I'm also endeavoring to wean myself off of my SSRIs.  I was taking a combo of Lexapro and Welbutrin daily I was able to get through life pretty well.  I did notice that despite my mellowness I had virtually no ambition, and when you add a ton of MMJ to the mix, well it's not a recipe for success.  I'm successfully off of the Welbutrin and I'm down to 5 mg of the Lexapro daily.  My patience with Kaylee is waning, but I'm really making a concerted effort not to allow it to affect me too badly, or affect her too greatly either.  She doesn't deserve to be treated poorly just because Daddy isn't taking his happy pills.  I do need a break from her though, and those often make me feel better towards her.  She's just difficult to deal with on a regular basis like any child is to their parents.  She's got to concentrate on her spelling, math and writing skills.  Like almost every child.

I've been off of MMJ since March.  Sure I will still partake occasionally, but not daily as I had been, and not to the extent I was using previously either.  And when I say occasionally it's more like once in a blue moon.  I have begun to imbibe the occasional adult beverage roughly once a week or so, and not to the extent of my 20's either.  I guess abstaining for over a decade will allow one to learn how to drink RESPONSIBLY, as if that is really a thing.  Sure made Happy Hours fun though.

In my 20's I could easily drink a lot, a six pack of beer was no problem, neither was 6 or 7 mixed drinks.  At my peak I could go on red bull and vodka for an entire night.  That led to my fatty liver diagnosis at age 31 and my reason for abstaining for over 10 years.  Solid.

My coworkers at were a bunch of youngsters who liked to party, and for over a year I didn't really party with them, but as my personal life started to implode, I started to look for ways to be more social so that I could still have a semblance of being a well-rounded extravert rather than just another INTJ like so many of the millennials.  I'm not a millennial, and I'm not an I on the meyers-briggs.  I just took another test and today I'm ENFP [Extravert(47%)  iNtuitive(38%)  Feeling(6%)  Perceiving(16%)]  Go figure.  Apparently I'm a “CAMPAIGNER.  ENFP (-A/-T) Enthusiastic, creative and sociable free spirits, who can always find a reason to smile."

Well, I do try.

I owe the coffee shop a dollar.